no im pretty sure elves are just called elves besides these elves are up at the north pole its snowy there like here no flowers to suck even if they wanted to
the Blasted Lands are lands that are blasted elementals live there that is where I am from except I am from the part where there are not elementals because there are angry ghosts instead
yes it is good job with your studies ecks a+ the country is the united states of america but thats not exactly what the country part of the name means country is also like the area between cities where people have farms and ranches and stuff like that
ive got news for you ecks youre in america welcome to the us of a and the admin already considers us citizens just by being here so you get to bypass all the complicated immigration laws uncle sam says sup
uncle sam is this dude in a dumb hat with a white beard who hassles you to join the army once youre american hes automatically a legal member of your family because if theres one thing i know about the average american family its that having a jingoistic blowhard who never shuts up about the military is standard anyway us of a is just the united states of america but with initials instead of full words and texas is way down south of here and kind of east so no its not nearby
I do not have a family I do not want Uncle Sam in my family I do not want to join the army and be a soldier I do not want to kill people I do not want Uncle Sam I do not want do not no no no no
oh shit ecks listen i was lying i meant it as a joke uncle sam isnt your uncle or any other kind of family member and he isnt any kind of real person either hes made up santa is also made up theyre stories that represent ideas you dont have to join the army or kill anyone ever again ok im sorry
[Uncomfortable indeed. He didn't meant to fuck up, but he did, and the topic doesn't get much more uncomfortable than that. And when the message finally does come...]
if you want me to do that for you then ok
[He doesn't much like tipping his hand, but for her he can compromise.]
ill still joke the regular way with other people but if you want to ask about that when it happens i can clear things up for you that way too i dont want to freak you out like that again
house is a jackass and you can tell thats not a joke because i didnt smile after it hes useful to know but being nice isnt something hes good at and youre not a moron ecks youre inexperienced compared to older people and you dont know all this modern stuff plus you take things literally a lot of the time being a jerk about those wont make them suddenly not a thing
being inexperienced isnt youre fault you just havent lived as long as other people as all youll learn over time and youve learned a lot already human two years olds cant do half the stuff you do not even a quarter of it do you want me to tell you the truth about santa and uncle sam
either 16 or 17 i think 17 now i lost track for a while because of time travel but anyway so i think santa was originally based on a real dude called saint nicholas but hes been dead forever and whatever he did the idea of santa claus has evolved past it into its own cultural thing about a guy who does impossible shit like a story character more or less so like first thing you need to know is that theres this holiday called christmas and on christmas people celebrate with a pine tree thats been decorated and there are these presents underneath it santa claus is supposed to be the guy who brings the presents hes big and fat and wears a red coat and has a flying sleigh led by reindeer and theyve all got names but i cant remember them all one of them is rudolph who has this nose that glows and he guides the sleigh but thats kind of off topic back to santa he also lives up at the north pole where he has this workshop full of elves making toys year round so he can deliver them the night before christmas to all the kids whove been good meanwhile kids whove been bad just get a lump of coal but like i said thats all a fake story parents tell kids santa brings the presents and that they have to be good basically just to get them to behave and theyre the ones who buy the presents and stick them under the tree after the kids have gone to sleep on christmas eve eventually they get told santa is fake or figure it out themselves or spot a parent moving around at night or whatever meanwhile uncle sam is this character with like a striped top hat and old timey blue suit and a white beard he was created as a piece of propaganda to try to get people to join the army hes not anybodys actual uncle because hes fake and he cant make you join or fight or do anything if youve got extra questions i can try to clarify
I knew that Santa entered houses at night and left things in those houses on Christmas I learned that part when it was Christmas here but Santa never came to the house where Doctor Stein and I were sleeping that night also the part with coal and elven slaves
why do the parents give their children secret presents? to make them behave well? do they only behave well at Christmas?
do people not join the army if they do not want to join the army?
yep he didnt come because hes not real kids are supposed to behave well year round but the santa thing is like an extra excuse for it plus if theyre getting all these presents its like a way of earning it kinda be good and you get good things more or less beyond that its just a weird tradition not every tradition makes much sense honestly anyway as for the army theres sometimes this thing called a draft that means you HAVE to join but there hasnt been one for decades on my earth and even then the draft only recruited men who were at least age 18 so you would be safe either way otherwise if people dont want to join they just stay out
that means Santa is not watching me and judging me at all times that is good except maybe I would make better choices if someone were watching me and judging me at all times I think I understand this tradition
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cw fantasy racist slur
that is what they are called
cw fantasy racist slur
besides these elves are up at the north pole
its snowy there like here
no flowers to suck even if they wanted to
cw fantasy racist slur
strange
[She never really thought about that.]
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elementals live there
that is where I am from except I am from the part where there are not elementals because there are angry ghosts instead
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im from texas
which is blasted with more humidity than satans asscrack and enough country music it should be illegal
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also what country is the music from?
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good job with your studies ecks a+
the country is the united states of america but thats not exactly what the country part of the name means
country is also like
the area between cities
where people have farms and ranches and stuff like that
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[Wow! She's never gotten higher than a B before now!]
if that is what country is I have been to the country
but not that country
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youre in america
welcome to the us of a
and the admin already considers us citizens just by being here so you get to bypass all the complicated immigration laws
uncle sam says sup
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us of a what?
is Texas near Alaska?
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once youre american hes automatically a legal member of your family
because if theres one thing i know about the average american family its that having a jingoistic blowhard who never shuts up about the military is standard
anyway
us of a is just the united states of america but with initials instead of full words
and texas is way down south of here and kind of east
so no its not nearby
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I do not want Uncle Sam in my family
I do not want to join the army and be a soldier
I do not want to kill people
I do not want Uncle Sam
I do not want
do not
no no no no
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ecks listen i was lying
i meant it as a joke
uncle sam isnt your uncle or any other kind of family member
and he isnt any kind of real person either
hes made up
santa is also made up
theyre stories that represent ideas
you dont have to join the army or kill anyone ever again ok
im sorry
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if it is a joke you have to smile after the joke like :)
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if you want me to do that for you
then ok
[He doesn't much like tipping his hand, but for her he can compromise.]
ill still joke the regular way with other people
but if you want to ask about that when it happens i can clear things up for you that way too
i dont want to freak you out like that again
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I can ask if I am not sure
usually I ask and then Doctor House tells me I am a moron
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and you can tell thats not a joke because i didnt smile after it
hes useful to know but being nice isnt something hes good at
and youre not a moron ecks
youre inexperienced compared to older people and you dont know all this modern stuff
plus you take things literally a lot of the time
being a jerk about those wont make them suddenly not a thing
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I have been learning about the different kinds of lies
like sarcasm and jokes
I can learn and I want to learn
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you just havent lived as long as other people as all
youll learn over time and youve learned a lot already
human two years olds cant do half the stuff you do
not even a quarter of it
do you want me to tell you the truth about santa and uncle sam
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I want you to tell me the truth about santa and uncle sam
how many years have you lived?
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i think 17 now
i lost track for a while because of time travel
but anyway so
i think santa was originally based on a real dude called saint nicholas
but hes been dead forever and whatever he did the idea of santa claus has evolved past it into its own cultural thing about a guy who does impossible shit
like a story character more or less
so like
first thing you need to know is that theres this holiday called christmas
and on christmas people celebrate with a pine tree thats been decorated and there are these presents underneath it
santa claus is supposed to be the guy who brings the presents
hes big and fat and wears a red coat and has a flying sleigh led by reindeer
and theyve all got names but i cant remember them all
one of them is rudolph who has this nose that glows and he guides the sleigh but thats kind of off topic
back to santa
he also lives up at the north pole where he has this workshop full of elves making toys year round so he can deliver them the night before christmas to all the kids whove been good
meanwhile kids whove been bad just get a lump of coal
but like i said thats all a fake story
parents tell kids santa brings the presents and that they have to be good basically just to get them to behave
and theyre the ones who buy the presents and stick them under the tree after the kids have gone to sleep on christmas eve
eventually they get told santa is fake or figure it out themselves or spot a parent moving around at night or whatever
meanwhile uncle sam is this character with like a striped top hat and old timey blue suit and a white beard
he was created as a piece of propaganda to try to get people to join the army
hes not anybodys actual uncle because hes fake and he cant make you join or fight or do anything
if youve got extra questions i can try to clarify
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I learned that part when it was Christmas here but Santa never came to the house where Doctor Stein and I were sleeping that night
also the part with coal
and elven slaves
why do the parents give their children secret presents?
to make them behave well?
do they only behave well at Christmas?
do people not join the army if they do not want to join the army?
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he didnt come because hes not real
kids are supposed to behave well year round but the santa thing is like an extra excuse for it
plus if theyre getting all these presents its like
a way of earning it kinda
be good and you get good things more or less
beyond that its just a weird tradition
not every tradition makes much sense honestly
anyway as for the army theres sometimes this thing called a draft that means you HAVE to join
but there hasnt been one for decades on my earth
and even then the draft only recruited men who were at least age 18
so you would be safe either way
otherwise if people dont want to join they just stay out
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that is good
except maybe I would make better choices if someone were watching me and judging me at all times
I think I understand this tradition
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